Well, sometimes you just have to write.
Since I last wrote on my blog, so many things have changed. I started and finished my Master's degree, I started a PhD, and now I'm seven months into my first pregnancy. Perhaps intuitively, this means that there is not usually much to report about knitting. A lot of my energy has been devoted to finishing obligations for school. Or perhaps more accurately, stressing about getting my school obligations done in time for the baby?
The other main challenge of the past few weeks was dealing with pregnancy complications that had me admitted to the hospital multiple times in the past six weeks. After my second hospitalization, it was becoming clear that monitoring my symptoms and being ready to go back to the hospital was going to be the primary goal for me. It was hard to focus on school or work projects when worries about my and my child's health were clearly the highest priority. Coping became more challenging as the symptoms persisted for weeks. On the bright side, this meant more knitting and calm days than I would have wanted, so there will be knitting to report soon!
The great news is my most recent hospitalization (I just returned home yesterday) revealed that my condition cleared, and my corresponding symptoms seem to have cleared as well. For the first time in weeks, I put away the whole contents of my hospital bag and felt myself smile, growing more excited for our baby boy coming this fall.
At this time, I am choosing to be hopeful that the tests are correct and the rest of my pregnancy--only a few months--can be free of complications and stress (or at least unusual stress). This means I get to turn back to school and work obligations with a clearer and focused mind.
Another truly meaningful takeaway is how clearly your priorities and values become clear to you when you are coping with more life threatening situations. I am so grateful to have had the time to realize how important my family, studies, and creative endeavors are to me. Especially in academia, it is easy to get caught up in the busy aspects of the day and lose touch with the confidence and curiosity that drives all the work we do.
How funny that I find my motivation again just a few short months before I'm taking several months off to begin life as a parent? Hopefully parenthood continues to solidify these goals for me, making meaning out of the days and years of research ahead.
I hope the summer is treating all of you well!
